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From: mnm_1625 on 16 Mar 2007 11:44
i really need help i met my fiance 3 years ago and he has 2 children
one he himself adopted and a little girl he had with his ex
girlfriend. well she hates me! she comes around once a month to get
the kids and she pays no child support and gets all kinds of money
from god knows where and helps none with the kids. i have no job
because i am going into my 5th month of pregnancy- so moneys tight. i
do everything around the house and with the kids but they love their
mommy like shes the best one- and i dont care about that but when we
have plans for the kids she doesnt care and cusses me out all the time
because i tell her we are busy and to call back some other time and
when she DOES come get them she is always getting them at like 9 or 10
at night and telling me if i need them home by a certain time i can
get them myself.these are 6 and 7 year old kids and she talks all the
time about me telling them they dont have to listen to me i am no
where near their mom and i am all these nasty names.. they claim they
hate going there but when she calls they love it! they tell me she
smokes weed all the time and i hate putting them around that but until
i am married i cant do anything about their little girl (she had full
custody of her but she lives with us). their mom gets beat by her
husband in front of them all the time HELP ME WHAT CAN I DO!! i cant
keep putting her around this Bull-*hit!

From: Nan on 16 Mar 2007 14:16
On 16 Mar 2007 08:44:09 -0700, mnm_1625(a)yahoo.com wrote:

>i really need help i met my fiance 3 years ago and he has 2 children
>one he himself adopted and a little girl he had with his ex
>girlfriend. well she hates me! she comes around once a month to get
>the kids and she pays no child support and gets all kinds of money
>from god knows where and helps none with the kids. i have no job
>because i am going into my 5th month of pregnancy- so moneys tight. i
>do everything around the house and with the kids but they love their
>mommy like shes the best one- and i dont care about that but when we
>have plans for the kids she doesnt care and cusses me out all the time
>because i tell her we are busy and to call back some other time and
>when she DOES come get them she is always getting them at like 9 or 10
>at night and telling me if i need them home by a certain time i can
>get them myself.these are 6 and 7 year old kids and she talks all the
>time about me telling them they dont have to listen to me i am no
>where near their mom and i am all these nasty names.. they claim they
>hate going there but when she calls they love it! they tell me she
>smokes weed all the time and i hate putting them around that but until
>i am married i cant do anything about their little girl (she had full
>custody of her but she lives with us). their mom gets beat by her
>husband in front of them all the time HELP ME WHAT CAN I DO!! i cant
>keep putting her around this Bull-*hit!

What does your fiancee say about the situation?

Nan

From: Robert from Michigan on 27 Mar 2007 19:39
I would suggest putting a call into the childrens school to address the
issue, as the school can be an "impartial" 3rd party to address the issue,
simply call and talk to the childrens counselors about your concerns and ask
that they speak to the children, as BY law the school would have a duty to
report the situation to the proper authorities and you would be out of the
loop.. most times coming from the "other" parent or his/her S/O it is taken
as biased by the police, cps and the courts.. You need a 3rd party in your
corner

when I went thru my divorce I notified the schools, as well as CPS and had
EVERYTHING documented down to the smallest thing, just to cover my butt. I
ended up with FULL physical and legal custody and pretty much control HOW
and WHEN my ex sees the children.. which I have never completly denied her,
I just am very open with her about my concerns to the point that she gets
offended most times, but that is her issue not mine.

(she had a habit of not feeding them correctly, sending them home smelling
of cat urine..ect... )

I finally got the court to allow me to use MY judgement as to when and how
she sees them, being my (current)_ wife or I have to supervise what is going
on with them. After my ex proved to be a NO show for almost 4 years but
once every 4 months I was able to get the court to allow me more lattitude
with the visitation schedule as long as it was deemed "fair" and that she
called to give me at least a 12 hour notice (night before) that she was
going to show up..

- also it didnt hurt that my current wife works for Child Protective
Services...lol

It is a long fight, but he must prove to the court that he is fighting for
the children and nothing else, it is hard to prove to be UNbiased but it can
be done.

Robert



<mnm_1625(a)yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:1174059849.719689.158010(a)n59g2000hsh.googlegroups.com...
>i really need help i met my fiance 3 years ago and he has 2 children
> one he himself adopted and a little girl he had with his ex
> girlfriend. well she hates me! she comes around once a month to get
> the kids and she pays no child support and gets all kinds of money
> from god knows where and helps none with the kids. i have no job
> because i am going into my 5th month of pregnancy- so moneys tight. i
> do everything around the house and with the kids but they love their
> mommy like shes the best one- and i dont care about that but when we
> have plans for the kids she doesnt care and cusses me out all the time
> because i tell her we are busy and to call back some other time and
> when she DOES come get them she is always getting them at like 9 or 10
> at night and telling me if i need them home by a certain time i can
> get them myself.these are 6 and 7 year old kids and she talks all the
> time about me telling them they dont have to listen to me i am no
> where near their mom and i am all these nasty names.. they claim they
> hate going there but when she calls they love it! they tell me she
> smokes weed all the time and i hate putting them around that but until
> i am married i cant do anything about their little girl (she had full
> custody of her but she lives with us). their mom gets beat by her
> husband in front of them all the time HELP ME WHAT CAN I DO!! i cant
> keep putting her around this Bull-*hit!
>
>


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