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From: jasarileel on 6 Dec 2005 22:11
ok here is my story. My 6 year old son has ADHD for sure but everone knows
that there is something else going on. He is extremely agressive and mean.
Like a temper tantrum times 10. I am in the process of gettiing him a TSS
for school time but that is not an answer. The school is doing nothing but
giving me an unrealistic IEP that does no good. And the family doctor is
frustrated because all of these poeple i am envolved with are not doing
what they need to do to get my son the proper diagnosis. The doctor can
refer me to the hospital behavioral health program but the waiting list is
approx. 1 year. And she said "how am I supposed to treat something and I do
not know what it is I am treating!" this is besides the ADHD. I have been
bounced around and I feel like I am caught in this big circle and getting
no answers. I am constently calling off of work because he keeps getting
suspended from school or the bus. And I am afraid that this situation is
going to land me on welfare! My son is a loving boy who deserves just like
me or you to be treated properly and have proper treatment. My question is
how do I do this because no one seems to be helping me in getting my son
the diagnosis. I don't know what to do!Does anyone have any suggestions as
to what I can do?

From: Maria P on 8 Dec 2005 09:24
Has he been tested for learning disabilities? ADD can co-exist with
learning disabilities making the diagnosis/treatment difficult. You say the
IEP is unrealistic. Is it based just on the ADD or was additional testing
done to determine if there were other LDs? Do you understand the tests that
were done and the significance of the results? I am not saying this to be
offensive--reality is that the school system has a strong economic interest
in not providing services. So, you may not get a good explanation of the
tests from the school and/or the school may not provide additional tests if
the original ones may be highlighting a problem--so, subtle issues may be
ignored. You need to understand very clearly what tests they did and why
and whether other tests should have been done... If the IEP only discusses
ADD things like extra time on tests, able to move about the classroom,
seating him in the front of the room, and he is otherwise learning disabled,
then the IEP may be missing the point entirely.

I have one child with severe ADD and auditory processing difficulties and
one who is dyslexic. The testing for the dyslexic child was taking forever
in second grade (for some reason the school system seems comfortable
ignoring time limits--you should make sure your district is not doing
that--there are deadlines so check your laws!). Anyway, he was frustrated
and acting out--the suggestion from the teachers was a method to remove him
from the classroom when he was a problem. (an easy fix for the school, a
useless "fix" for my son.) I flatly refused to do that and said I would
always refuse to do that--He was a kind and gentle boy--if his educational
issues were fixed, his behavioral problems would be fixed as well. Well,
they were shocked that even ganging up on me to sign a form yielded
nothing--so they finished the testing and started providing him appropriate
services and, voila! he has never been a behavior problem since (now in 7th
grade). Also, my daughter's auditory processing issues are severe but
subtle--The school did the first set of tests, and said she was fine
although there were many subtle cues that additional testing was warranted.
I had to hire an outside person to evaluate the initial test results ( I
would not have seen these subtle cues) so I could know what additional tests
to ask for and what plans were appropriate.

Bottom line, make sure you understand what they did and did not do in
preparation for the IEP and what the IEP is supposed to address. There are
mechanisms to ask for additional testing and make changes in the IEP even
though the review is only yearly. You may want to look into all of this to
see if the IEP is appropriate--doing this should be faster than waiting for
a behavioral unit in a medical facility. It should also be cheaper since it
should be free. It will cost something only if you need to hire an advocate
or someone to explain the test results--that can be a good investment since,
once you have an appropriate IEP, you may not need much help interpreting
subsequent ones...

If the behavioral issue is truly an emergency (not trying to insult you,
just saying does the doctor know that???), then the doctor should have some
advice--with an emergency, you cannot wait a year and someone should be able
to intercede. Don't be reluctant to share your concerns with the doctor to
see if calls can be made to get you in earlier. Also, think of alternatives
to the behavioral unit (although I realize the alternatives may cost more).
You may be able to find a social worker or nurse or psychiatrist or
educational coach/consultant you feel is qualified to offer some type of
advice/testing or whatever may be appropriate. And, some of these may be
under your health insurance if you have it and if it has some type of mental
health coverage. Also, get on the waiting list for the behavioral
unit--right away!

Don't give up--you are your child's best advocate--even when it feels like
things are not going well--and your child needs you to rally. I am sure the
school system hates me but both of my children are extremely bright and
severely disabled--they need and are entitled to services and I make sure
they get them--well, that is annoying to a school system who wants to save
money....

Good luck!

--Maria



> ok here is my story. My 6 year old son has ADHD for sure but everone knows
> that there is something else going on. He is extremely agressive and mean.
> Like a temper tantrum times 10. I am in the process of gettiing him a TSS
> for school time but that is not an answer. The school is doing nothing but
> giving me an unrealistic IEP that does no good. And the family doctor is
> frustrated because all of these poeple i am envolved with are not doing
> what they need to do to get my son the proper diagnosis. The doctor can
> refer me to the hospital behavioral health program but the waiting list is
> approx. 1 year.


From: MothWrangler on 8 Dec 2005 22:53
jasarileel wrote:

> ok here is my story. My 6 year old son has ADHD for sure but everone knows
> that there is something else going on. He is extremely agressive and mean.
> Like a temper tantrum times 10. I am in the process of gettiing him a TSS
> for school time but that is not an answer.

What is a "TSS"?

> The school is doing nothing but
> giving me an unrealistic IEP that does no good.

So, what did you do when that happened? Ask for another IEP meeting to
discuss changing the IEP? Ask for mediation? Appeal the school's decision?

> And the family doctor is
> frustrated because all of these poeple i am envolved with are not doing
> what they need to do to get my son the proper diagnosis.

Who are "all of these people" to whom you refer? And what have they done
so far, what else do you want them to do, and what actions have you
taken so far to get them to do what you want them to do?

Keep in mind that members of the school staff aren't doctors and cannot
diagnose your son.

> The doctor can
> refer me to the hospital behavioral health program but the waiting list is
> approx. 1 year. And she said "how am I supposed to treat something and I do
> not know what it is I am treating!" this is besides the ADHD.

Is this your child's pediatrician or psychiatrist or ??

How has your son's doctor tried to treat your son's behavior problems so
far? Medication? A behavior management program?

Is there some reason that the only place to which your doctor can refer
your son is the hospital's program? Aren't there any child behavioral
specialists in your area who can see your son sooner?

> I have been
> bounced around and I feel like I am caught in this big circle and getting
> no answers. I am constently calling off of work because he keeps getting
> suspended from school or the bus.

What does you son's IEP say about your son's behavior issues and how the
school is supposed to deal them them?

When the IEP is developed, the IEP team is supposed to consider how the
child's behavior will impede his learning (or that of other students),
and consider the use of positive behavioral interventions and supports,
and other strategies, to address that behavior. Was that done?

Has your son's school conducted a functional behavioral assessment of
him? If not, request one ASAP. Then the IEP team should develop a
behavioral intervention plan based on the specific findings of that
assessment.

It's very important that you make sure you know your son's legal rights
with regard to school disciplinary matters and suspensions.

For example, under the IDEA, the school may suspend your son for not
more than 10 days for each incident of misbehavior (with certain
exceptions for very serious misconduct, like carrying a weapon to
school.) Suspensions for more than 10 days is considered a "change in
placement."

Even a series of suspensions for less than 10 days for separate
incidents which add up to more than 10 days total might be considered in
some circumstances to be a "change in placement."

Once there's a such a "change in placement," the IDEA gives your son
certain legal rights, including the right to a manifestation
determination (a determination of whether your son's behavior was
related to his disability or the school's failure to implement his IEP).

If a determination is made that your child's behavior was caused by his
disability or the school's failure to implement his IEP, your son has
additional legal rights.

> And I am afraid that this situation is
> going to land me on welfare! My son is a loving boy who deserves just like
> me or you to be treated properly and have proper treatment. My question is
> how do I do this because no one seems to be helping me in getting my son
> the diagnosis. I don't know what to do!Does anyone have any suggestions as
> to what I can do?

Every state should have a Parent Training Information Center (PTI) which
can give you support and information. If you haven't gone to them yet
for help, I urge you do to so.

If you don't know how to contact your local PTI, or other agencies which
might be helpful to you, there's a list on the Wrightslaw web site. Go
to http://wrightslaw.com and click on "Yellow Pages for Kids."

BTW, the Wrightslaw web site is an all around great resource about the
legal rights of children with disabilities.


Nancy
Unique, like everyone else

From: MothWrangler on 8 Dec 2005 23:34
Maria P wrote:
> Has he been tested for learning disabilities? ADD can co-exist with
> learning disabilities making the diagnosis/treatment difficult. You say the
> IEP is unrealistic. Is it based just on the ADD or was additional testing
> done to determine if there were other LDs? Do you understand the tests that
> were done and the significance of the results? I am not saying this to be
> offensive--reality is that the school system has a strong economic interest
> in not providing services. So, you may not get a good explanation of the
> tests from the school and/or the school may not provide additional tests if
> the original ones may be highlighting a problem--so, subtle issues may be
> ignored. You need to understand very clearly what tests they did and why
> and whether other tests should have been done... If the IEP only discusses
> ADD things like extra time on tests, able to move about the classroom,
> seating him in the front of the room, and he is otherwise learning disabled,
> then the IEP may be missing the point entirely.
>
> I have one child with severe ADD and auditory processing difficulties and
> one who is dyslexic. The testing for the dyslexic child was taking forever
> in second grade (for some reason the school system seems comfortable
> ignoring time limits--you should make sure your district is not doing
> that--there are deadlines so check your laws!). Anyway, he was frustrated
> and acting out--the suggestion from the teachers was a method to remove him
> from the classroom when he was a problem. (an easy fix for the school, a
> useless "fix" for my son.) I flatly refused to do that and said I would
> always refuse to do that--He was a kind and gentle boy--if his educational
> issues were fixed, his behavioral problems would be fixed as well. Well,
> they were shocked that even ganging up on me to sign a form yielded
> nothing--so they finished the testing and started providing him appropriate
> services and, voila! he has never been a behavior problem since (now in 7th
> grade). Also, my daughter's auditory processing issues are severe but
> subtle--The school did the first set of tests, and said she was fine
> although there were many subtle cues that additional testing was warranted.
> I had to hire an outside person to evaluate the initial test results ( I
> would not have seen these subtle cues) so I could know what additional tests
> to ask for and what plans were appropriate.
>
> Bottom line, make sure you understand what they did and did not do in
> preparation for the IEP and what the IEP is supposed to address. There are
> mechanisms to ask for additional testing and make changes in the IEP even
> though the review is only yearly. You may want to look into all of this to
> see if the IEP is appropriate--doing this should be faster than waiting for
> a behavioral unit in a medical facility. It should also be cheaper since it
> should be free. It will cost something only if you need to hire an advocate
> or someone to explain the test results--that can be a good investment since,
> once you have an appropriate IEP, you may not need much help interpreting
> subsequent ones...
>
> If the behavioral issue is truly an emergency (not trying to insult you,
> just saying does the doctor know that???), then the doctor should have some
> advice--with an emergency, you cannot wait a year and someone should be able
> to intercede. Don't be reluctant to share your concerns with the doctor to
> see if calls can be made to get you in earlier. Also, think of alternatives
> to the behavioral unit (although I realize the alternatives may cost more).
> You may be able to find a social worker or nurse or psychiatrist or
> educational coach/consultant you feel is qualified to offer some type of
> advice/testing or whatever may be appropriate. And, some of these may be
> under your health insurance if you have it and if it has some type of mental
> health coverage. Also, get on the waiting list for the behavioral
> unit--right away!
>
> Don't give up--you are your child's best advocate--even when it feels like
> things are not going well--and your child needs you to rally. I am sure the
> school system hates me but both of my children are extremely bright and
> severely disabled--they need and are entitled to services and I make sure
> they get them--well, that is annoying to a school system who wants to save
> money....
>
> Good luck!
>
> --Maria

All good advice, Maria.

It's so important to not only get a appropriate diagnosis ASAP, but also
to know your child's legal rights, and, very importantly, to hang in
there and keep advocating for your child when the school system isn't
doing what you think it should.

>>ok here is my story. My 6 year old son has ADHD for sure but everone knows
>>that there is something else going on. He is extremely agressive and mean.
>>Like a temper tantrum times 10. I am in the process of gettiing him a TSS
>>for school time but that is not an answer. The school is doing nothing but
>>giving me an unrealistic IEP that does no good. And the family doctor is
>>frustrated because all of these poeple i am envolved with are not doing
>>what they need to do to get my son the proper diagnosis. The doctor can
>>refer me to the hospital behavioral health program but the waiting list is
>>approx. 1 year.


Nancy
Unique, like everyone else
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