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From: Rudolf on 24 Mar 2007 13:38
My father died recently after a triple heart bypass op. Two days after
the op he said, "It's all gone wrong. I'm dying." My sister, who was
visiting him, refused to believe him - she couldn't "go there". She
said he seemed to be experiencing a mixture of silent anger and dismay
- which hardly
expresses it, I imagine.

A few hours afterwards, my father was sedated. He was brought out of
sedation 7 days later. I was there then with my sister, and this time
he seemed calm and was visibly pleased to see us. He couldn't talk,
and he knew that, as he'd had a tracheotomy in the meantime. My sister
told him that his surgeon said his op had gone very well. My father
raised his head from the pillow and, with a resigned smile, shook his
head and mouthed the word "No". Not many minutes later he developed
breathing difficulties and had to be re-sedated. He died the following
evening.

Very sad in retrospect, but I'm glad he came to terms with his
impending death. My thought is, how do people know they're dying? What
are they feeling or experiencing? My father died of sepsis leading to
multiple organ failure - a known risk, post-heart-surgery. He was 77,
at greater risk, and very unlucky.

My very simplistic guess, as someone not versed in medicine, is that
when cell death is occurring, the dying person must somehow experience
it - most likely as a mass draining of energy. But I'm only guessing.
Does anyone know of people who've experienced similar and been able to
describe and
express what they were feeling and experiencing? I have no religious
and spiritual beliefs and am not talking about near-death-experiences,
or of people such as long-term cancer-victims - only of people who
realise hours or days beforehand that they are dying.

Has anyone had similar experiences?

Rudolf.

From: ~*LiveLoveLaugh*~ on 24 Mar 2007 19:25

"Rudolf" <p_mcloughlin(a)yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:1174757906.489502.200730(a)o5g2000hsb.googlegroups.com...
> My father died recently after a triple heart bypass op. Two days after
> the op he said, "It's all gone wrong. I'm dying." My sister, who was
> visiting him, refused to believe him - she couldn't "go there". She
> said he seemed to be experiencing a mixture of silent anger and dismay
> - which hardly
> expresses it, I imagine.
>
> A few hours afterwards, my father was sedated. He was brought out of
> sedation 7 days later. I was there then with my sister, and this time
> he seemed calm and was visibly pleased to see us. He couldn't talk,
> and he knew that, as he'd had a tracheotomy in the meantime. My sister
> told him that his surgeon said his op had gone very well. My father
> raised his head from the pillow and, with a resigned smile, shook his
> head and mouthed the word "No". Not many minutes later he developed
> breathing difficulties and had to be re-sedated. He died the following
> evening.
>
> Very sad in retrospect, but I'm glad he came to terms with his
> impending death. My thought is, how do people know they're dying? What
> are they feeling or experiencing? My father died of sepsis leading to
> multiple organ failure - a known risk, post-heart-surgery. He was 77,
> at greater risk, and very unlucky.
>
> My very simplistic guess, as someone not versed in medicine, is that
> when cell death is occurring, the dying person must somehow experience
> it - most likely as a mass draining of energy. But I'm only guessing.
> Does anyone know of people who've experienced similar and been able to
> describe and
> express what they were feeling and experiencing? I have no religious
> and spiritual beliefs and am not talking about near-death-experiences,
> or of people such as long-term cancer-victims - only of people who
> realise hours or days beforehand that they are dying.
>
> Has anyone had similar experiences?

Rudolph,

Back in December, one day I was in Mom's room with her. She was becoming
agitated, so while I tried to settle her down, Dad went and got her dose of
morphine. I asked Mom what was wrong... what was bothering or hurting her.
She said "It all hurts". And then she said "Oh, I'm dying, I'm dying". I
sat w/her while Dad gave her the morphine. I waited until she settled down
and fell back asleep. Then I put my head on her chest and sobbed. I don't
know if it was the pain, or if it was just the agitation of her knowing her
destiny. Either way, it broke my heart when she said those words.

Mom didn't pass for another week or so, but it was the first time she said
that. She knew she was going to die long before that... but maybe God was
telling her it would be soon. Just my take on it to perhaps make it easier
on me.

--

�.��� �)) -:�:-
�.�� .����))
Laurie
((��.�� ..��
-:�:- ((�� �.�

*~*LiveLoveLaugh*~*

All that I am or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.
~Abraham Lincoln


>
> Rudolf.
>


From: Rudolf on 24 Mar 2007 21:53
On Mar 24, 11:25 pm, "~*LiveLoveLaugh*~" <Nob...(a)myjunkaddy.com>
wrote:
> "Rudolf" <p_mclough...(a)yahoo.com> wrote in message
>
> news:1174757906.489502.200730(a)o5g2000hsb.googlegroups.com...
>
>
>
> > My father died recently after a triple heart bypass op. Two days after
> > the op he said, "It's all gone wrong. I'm dying." My sister, who was
> > visiting him, refused to believe him - she couldn't "go there". She
> > said he seemed to be experiencing a mixture of silent anger and dismay
> > - which hardly
> > expresses it, I imagine.
>
> > A few hours afterwards, my father was sedated. He was brought out of
> > sedation 7 days later. I was there then with my sister, and this time
> > he seemed calm and was visibly pleased to see us. He couldn't talk,
> > and he knew that, as he'd had a tracheotomy in the meantime. My sister
> > told him that his surgeon said his op had gone very well. My father
> > raised his head from the pillow and, with a resigned smile, shook his
> > head and mouthed the word "No". Not many minutes later he developed
> > breathing difficulties and had to be re-sedated. He died the following
> > evening.
>
> > Very sad in retrospect, but I'm glad he came to terms with his
> > impending death. My thought is, how do people know they're dying? What
> > are they feeling or experiencing? My father died of sepsis leading to
> > multiple organ failure - a known risk, post-heart-surgery. He was 77,
> > at greater risk, and very unlucky.
>
> > My very simplistic guess, as someone not versed in medicine, is that
> > when cell death is occurring, the dying person must somehow experience
> > it - most likely as a mass draining of energy. But I'm only guessing.
> > Does anyone know of people who've experienced similar and been able to
> > describe and
> > express what they were feeling and experiencing? I have no religious
> > and spiritual beliefs and am not talking about near-death-experiences,
> > or of people such as long-term cancer-victims - only of people who
> > realise hours or days beforehand that they are dying.
>
> > Has anyone had similar experiences?
>
> Rudolph,
>
> Back in December, one day I was in Mom's room with her. She was becoming
> agitated, so while I tried to settle her down, Dad went and got her dose of
> morphine. I asked Mom what was wrong... what was bothering or hurting her.
> She said "It all hurts". And then she said "Oh, I'm dying, I'm dying". I
> sat w/her while Dad gave her the morphine. I waited until she settled down
> and fell back asleep. Then I put my head on her chest and sobbed. I don't
> know if it was the pain, or if it was just the agitation of her knowing her
> destiny. Either way, it broke my heart when she said those words.
>
> Mom didn't pass for another week or so, but it was the first time she said
> that. She knew she was going to die long before that... but maybe God was
> telling her it would be soon. Just my take on it to perhaps make it easier
> on me.
>
> --
>
> ·.·´¨ ¨)) -:¦:-
> ¸.·´ .·´¨¨))
> Laurie
> ((¸¸.·´ ..·´
> -:¦:- ((¸¸ ·.·
>
> *~*LiveLoveLaugh*~*
>
> All that I am or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.
> ~Abraham Lincoln
>
>
>
> > Rudolf.

Hi Laurie,

Thanks for your reply. I was very moved by it. I too felt so sad that
my dad knew his destiny was to die. I think he accepted it -
eventually - because he was in hospital and knew he would be well
looked after, and also my sister and I were there with him, which was
undoubtedly a comfort to him. His panic turned to calm and smiles as
soon as he saw us. We were the last people he saw before he was re-
sedated and his eyes closed. Also he had said he couldn't go on as he
was - he could only walk for a minute or two before getting his angina
pains. His spray that used to help no longer did so. I think he was
afraid of the next attack and maybe dying alone and frightened.

Because of his tracheotomy he was unable to tell us what he was
feeling and why he knew he was dying. It's very hard to accept the
suffering of a loved one. I'd much rather he had died naturally,
peacefully unaware, and in his own bed.

Rudolf.

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