Overweight Child
in [Weight Watchers]
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From: Willow on 4 Jan 2006 15:36 Find yourself a good book about teenagers psychology.. There's obviously big gaps in your knowledge in that area and that could be disastrous for both of you. Until you accept that and deal with that.. you're wrecking the ship.. What it boils down to, and what pretty much everybody has told you, is that you're going at it the wrong way, you're not the person who can help her with that unless SHE decides you are... and forcing the issue will only make things worst. You mean well, you want to help and that's great, but get infos, see specialists (see them yourself, don't force her to see them), read books, make sure you know what you're doing before you destroy her self esteem. -- Will~ "... so that's how liberty ends, in a round of applause." Queen Amidala, The revenge of the Syth. "Lisa M" <lisa(a)lmdesigns.com> wrote in message news:1136236231.105178.16030(a)o13g2000cwo.googlegroups.com... > I'm not sure what's going on with her as far as her body image. > When she got busted sneaking the left over Halloween candy in her > father's closet that she snooped to find, she claimed that she's > not concerned with her weight "right now" and that it is her > "right" to have that candy that she worked hard to get ("work" > = trick-or-treating). Of course, he should have dumped it months > ago...But I found it interesting that she said that she doesn't care > about that "right now". She's wanted "belly shirts" in the > past, and thinks nothing of putting on the shortest skort for school > (which has since been tossed.) Part of my dilemma is that she SAYS she > doesn't care, and acts like she doesn't care. Her particular peer > group don't seem very interested in make-up, clothes or weight. > > The reality is that her father and I give her nurturing, which we do in > many ways. I just can't support watching the kid abuse her body and > demand that we support this by handing over the garbage she would > rather eat than the healthy food I'm trying hard to get these kids to > even try. > > We've graduated to spinach salads, which even though it takes the > kids a long time to get into them at the dinner table, we are getting > that food into them. I've gotten them to try a couple of new things > which have become part of their food vocabulary. "Core" turkey > stew is another one of these things, which I love. And believe me, > this has been and continues to be a struggle...getting them to even try > something new. > > I think I'm forcing the issue because of how painful it was to be an > overweight kid myself, and how I need to work hard to maintain a > healthy weight for myself. Honestly, I believe that part of the > struggle to lose weight is for people to cultivate a positive self > image that was so sorely lacking as kids grew up into overweight > adults, along with learning new eating habits. In concert with giving > her the emotional support she needs, I do believe that offering a > positive role model and better choices is the way to go. Don't we > all need that?? > >
From: Jangchub on 4 Jan 2006 23:31 And at that age I was 103 and 5'5" and my mother put me on amphetamines. The "REAL" speed, or as we called them in Brooklyn, ups. On Wed, 04 Jan 2006 20:43:04 GMT, "Willow" <bourgeois_melaniespamstuff(a)hotmail.com> wrote: >At around 12 years old I was 95 lbs at about 5 feet 4 inches tall or so >(didn't grow up much after that) and my mom put me on a diet because I was >GOING TO get fat... > >There's no class "Being a mom 101" i guess
From: Jangchub on 5 Jan 2006 09:49 On Thu, 05 Jan 2006 05:16:32 GMT, "Willow" <bourgeois_melaniespamstuff(a)hotmail.com> wrote: >Psychotic can be good !! *grin* I guess, but I'm not psychotic LOL! I just called it as I saw it. I didn't say it the same way others did. I don't walk on eggshells or tip toe around people and their abusive behavior. I have a huge spot for children and how their well meaning parents or step parents show their "love." Just about everyone said the same things I said, but they all said it softly. Same songs, different birds.
From: Willow on 5 Jan 2006 17:35 I'm like that face to face.. I call it as I see it.. Online it's very easy to misundertstand though.. I've done so often :o/ so I TRY to take a breather before I answer.. :o) -- Will~ "... so that's how liberty ends, in a round of applause." Queen Amidala, The revenge of the Syth. "Jangchub" <sakadawa(a)kopan.com> wrote in message news:5bcqr1t2litj2rla6qh24qmjbjmb0rvc40(a)4ax.com... > On Thu, 05 Jan 2006 05:16:32 GMT, "Willow" > <bourgeois_melaniespamstuff(a)hotmail.com> wrote: > > >Psychotic can be good !! *grin* > > I guess, but I'm not psychotic LOL! I just called it as I saw it. I > didn't say it the same way others did. I don't walk on eggshells or > tip toe around people and their abusive behavior. I have a huge spot > for children and how their well meaning parents or step parents show > their "love." Just about everyone said the same things I said, but > they all said it softly. Same songs, different birds.
From: Jangchub on 5 Jan 2006 22:11
On Thu, 05 Jan 2006 22:35:45 GMT, "Willow" <bourgeois_melaniespamstuff(a)hotmail.com> wrote: >I'm like that face to face.. I call it as I see it.. Online it's very easy >to misundertstand though.. I've done so often :o/ so I TRY to take a >breather before I answer.. :o) Oh for sure I am not brazen online then meek in person. There is no added bravado for online. I've been online for what, almost 20 years. That's hard to believe! |