Out of the closet
in [Autism]
|
Prev: Shock Jockism Spectrum Disorder - Blogging Autism
Next: M.D. / Ph.D / Neurologist / Father of Hannah Poling Speaks out to the Snake-oil Vigilantes & Other Vaccination Propagandists
From: Eva on 23 Jul 2008 22:36 For the umpity-umpity-umpity-umpteenth time in my life, someone--it happened to be my supervisor at work, but it could have been any one of hundreds of people--said to me "How could you not know that? *Everybody* knows that!" And for the *first* time in my life, I turned around and said, in what I hope was a tone of controlled fury, "Right! But I'm autistic, so I don't know what everybody else knows." And that ended the conversation, but I feel like I just stepped out of the closet. Usually after hearing that "How could you not know that?" question I would go off somewhere and cry. What's wrong with me? Why don't I know these things that everybody else knows? I'm not going to cry about it any more. You can't imagine how it feels after 60 years to have an answer. Wow. Eva
From: The Autist formerly known as on 24 Jul 2008 16:49 My position vis a vis the closet is kind of bizarre these days. Thought there be some that say whether or not I appear Autistic I don't appear anything like normal, I nonetheless these days have a new set of dillemae. It is not universally known in academia that I am autistic cos there still exist an atavistic strain who know not how to google (whether or not they were ever strangers in a strange land) And when I talk about my academic connection, which quite frankly is my identity at present, and talk enthusiastically (like your stereotypical Tony Atwood Aspie and his Dinosaurids) 'bout me special subject which is ... wait for it ... Autism I wonder (being stereotypically mindblind) whether they ever think I am what I describe. Well earlier today there was a certain debate about students wishing to reveal there profiles to the wider world and the risk and all, I dared not to say that you go google my name and I am winning the battle against Larry Arnold, who I most certainly am not :) -- �T L'autisme c'est moi "Space folds, and folded space bends, and bent folded space contracts and expands unevenly in every way unconcievable except to someone who does not believe in the laws of mathematics" "Eva" <EvaDStructionNO(a)NOverizon.net> wrote in message news:wrudnSEb8NFJdxrVnZ2dnUVZ_u6dnZ2d(a)giganews.com... > For the umpity-umpity-umpity-umpteenth time in my life, someone--it > happened to be my supervisor at work, but it could have been any one of > hundreds of people--said to me "How could you not know that? *Everybody* > knows that!" > > And for the *first* time in my life, I turned around and said, in what I > hope was a tone of controlled fury, "Right! But I'm autistic, so I don't > know what everybody else knows." > > And that ended the conversation, but I feel like I just stepped out of the > closet. > > Usually after hearing that "How could you not know that?" question I would > go off somewhere and cry. What's wrong with me? Why don't I know these > things that everybody else knows? > > I'm not going to cry about it any more. > > You can't imagine how it feels after 60 years to have an answer. Wow. > > Eva >
From: Raving on 24 Jul 2008 23:54 On Jul 24, 4:49 pm, "The Autist formerly known as" <o...(a)ym.andius> wrote: > My position vis a vis the closet is kind of bizarre these days. > > Thought there be some that say whether or not I appear Autistic I don't > appear anything like normal, I nonetheless these days have a new set of > dillemae. > > It is not universally known in academia that I am autistic cos there still > exist an atavistic strain who know not how to google (whether or not they > were ever strangers in a strange land) > > And when I talk about my academic connection, which quite frankly is my > identity at present, and talk enthusiastically (like your stereotypical Tony > Atwood Aspie and his Dinosaurids) 'bout me special subject which is ... > wait for it ... Autism I wonder (being stereotypically mindblind) whether > they ever think I am what I describe. - Boffins - Absent minded professors - Ivory towers - Academics who are autistic, yet have not recognized it. Your closet door might be the curtain of a dressing room. What if there were tapestries?
From: Arak on 25 Jul 2008 17:02 On Jul 23, 8:36 pm, "Eva" <EvaDStructio...(a)NOverizon.net> wrote: > For the umpity-umpity-umpity-umpteenth time in my life, someone--it happened > to be my supervisor at work, but it could have been any one of hundreds of > people--said to me "How could you not know that? *Everybody* knows that!" > > And for the *first* time in my life, I turned around and said, in what I > hope was a tone of controlled fury, "Right! But I'm autistic, so I don't > know what everybody else knows." > > And that ended the conversation, but I feel like I just stepped out of the > closet. > > Usually after hearing that "How could you not know that?" question I would > go off somewhere and cry. What's wrong with me? Why don't I know these > things that everybody else knows? > > I'm not going to cry about it any more. > > You can't imagine how it feels after 60 years to have an answer. Wow. > > Eva Hi Eva, Wow...good for you for standing up to your supervisor! Not all of us know what everyone else does (especially with regards to social behaviours which are rather against my logic). NT's seem to be able to learn all of these little things without thinking about it. I find that I need to think about it and learn it like anyone else would learn how to drive a car or do something: I need to be specifically told what it is and how I would benefit from knowing that. It also needs to make sense before I'll retain it. If it doesn't make sense to me, thn forget it! :^) Will the fact that they know you are autistic affect your work or chances for advancement? I admitted my diagnosis to my doctor a few years back (he never knew because I started seeing him as an adult and I never told him) and after that he started treating me like I was some sort of nutcase idiot. Needless to say I've got a new doctor and I have not told him about my condition! Back in 2003, I got "outed" when an interview I did at a fund raiser turned up on the front page of a major local paper. The reporter doing the interview said that it would be a little tiny article in the health and lifestyle section, but the editor must have thought a front page story about autism (you know, the big A word right now...) with my picture on the front in *full colour* would be a big seller. I was mortified when I picked the paper up on my porch that morning! What were people at work going to think?? I was just starting my IT career as a project manager - was I going to be demoted to little crappy jobs for the rest of my life because I'm autistic and am supposed to be retarded or violent (according to the popular advertisements and such out there about how horrible autism is)?? I did my best to make myself scarce, but that picture was everywhere! Everyone reads that paper. Luckily, the reaction was the opposite to what I was expecting. People at work were all "Wow! You've done so well!" The girls at the cafeteria all hugged me and said how great it was that I was autistic and working (gee, thanks...). People at the store were all friendly as well. My parents weren't even that disturbed even though they'd been trying to hide the fact that their daughter was autistic for years. All that said, I do not do interviews anymore. I'm not wanting to take that risk again. I've even legally changed my name so it is not the same as the one in the article. (That way, if I have to get a new job, no one associates me with that article) The supervisors I've had have been many in the past few years and with most of them, I could sense that they weren't giving me enough credit. My current one, however, has not seen the news article and he's known me for two years. We're very similar in personality - he's more social though - and he sees great potential in me. I've proven myself to be better than the doom and gloom that might have been associated with my condition through my own hard work and many chats with my boss. All of the people who worked for the company when that article came out have moved on, so I've gotten a fresh start and I keep the autism under wraps for the most part. Arak /|\
From: fortunata on 25 Jul 2008 18:05
"Eva" <EvaDStructionNO(a)NOverizon.net> wrote in message news:wrudnSEb8NFJdxrVnZ2dnUVZ_u6dnZ2d(a)giganews.com... > For the umpity-umpity-umpity-umpteenth time in my life, someone--it > happened to be my supervisor at work, but it could have been any one of > hundreds of people--said to me "How could you not know that? *Everybody* > knows that!" > > And for the *first* time in my life, I turned around and said, in what I > hope was a tone of controlled fury, "Right! But I'm autistic, so I don't > know what everybody else knows." it happens to NTs also. "You've never heard of JERRY LEWIS?" or "You never drank Nehi Orange Soda?" or "You don't know about the BEATLES???" what about "You didn't realize that New Mexico is PART OF THE UNITED STATES?" my autistic kid knows things lots of other people don't know. he has absolute pitch; I have to remind him (rarely) that other people don't realize when they're singing F sharp rather than G natural... > Usually after hearing that "How could you not know that?" question I would > go off somewhere and cry. What's wrong with me? Why don't I know these > things that everybody else knows? > > I'm not going to cry about it any more. > > You can't imagine how it feels after 60 years to have an answer. Wow. > > Eva > |